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This week Leonard from our Church will be sharing his thoughts. Enjoy!

A Choice

Recently, I had one of those evenings.

I was home alone after a draining day of work and simply fed up with everything. Of course, as you do, I was wallowing in self-pity. Thinking about how hard my life is, how I couldn’t get anything right, how all the odds are stacked against me. Why does life always have to feel like an uphill battle? Etc, etc.

You get the picture.

Now usually, at least 95% of the time, I would be stuck in this negative reinforcement loop for a while.

Just to get the tiniest dopamine kick, I would binge on chips or chocolate or anything else I could get my hands on – as long as it is unhealthy. To top it off I would indifferently browse the latest Reddit memes (I am an old man) as a poor attempt to escape reality.

But this time I didn’t want to go down that road again. All I wanted was life and light. So I thought: let’s pray – it doesn’t hurt. After pouring my heart out before God, unfiltered and raw, God gave me some rest.

That doesn’t always happen, but this time it did.

Just like Job, I had a choice: to close the door towards God when facing hardship, or to keep the communication channels wide open and share my experience with Him – even when it’s not pretty.

And this time I chose the latter. Does that make me a saint? Well, I did see the faintest beginnings of a halo around my head when I checked the mirror. Jokes aside, it does help to keep in mind that I have a choice even when I fail 95% of the time. I mean, if you read the story of Job, you’ll find he isn’t exactly a saint. But that doesn’t keep James from writing:

As you know, we count as blessed those who have persevered.

You have heard of Job’s perseverance and seen what the Lord brought about.

James 5:11a

James provides Job as an example of perseverance.

The very same raging, self-pitying Job? Yes! Despite – or rather – because of Job’s imperfections and failures, he is given as an example for us for how to deal with difficult times. You can rage and fail all you want, but the crucial thing is to not give up on God. He certainly will never give up on you! After all, James continues:

The Lord is full of compassion and mercy.

James 5:11b

God is not interested in some fake, idealized version of you. He is interested in you! He is full of compassion for you no matter how you feel and quick to forgive no matter how often you fail. And that’s a God worth choosing.

Be Blessed,

Leonard

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